Husband/Boyfriend Scapegoat


I used to be afraid of confrontation or maybe just insecure about saying what I felt or wanted.  I would use my husband/boyfriend to state my feelings.  I think some women use their children as well – kids are great for breaking appointments last-minute.

If I was uncomfortable saying “No”, I would say; “I will ask (or talk to) my husband”. 

I am single now and a little more mature.  Certainly not afraid to say “No” or that I need time to think about something.

When I have a client or friend who use their partner to express their feelings, I know it is really what they want.  I want to say; “I don’t care what he thinks, feels, or his opinion about it.  Just tell me what YOU want!” 

I once had a friend say; “What would Don think if you did that?”  I laughed out loud.  She just looked at me like I was crazy.  I asked her why she would think I would care what he thought about anything I said or did.  She could not answer.


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